Latin American Colonial Towns

For some reason, as much as they possess a stunning regularity, I am always seduced into traveling long distances, usually uncomfortable miles, to see another Latin Colonial Town. Now every Latin town, almost without exception, will have a Cathedral worth looking at, a cute town plaza, called a Zocalo in Mexico, and The Plaza Mayor, or Parque Central in the rest of Latin America. What makes these towns different is that in most modern Latin towns, the architecture beyond this square, or perhaps even on it, was destroyed to make way for growth and rid the homes of the plaster and thatch that can harbor pests that carry disease, and doesn't necessarily stand up to the elements, but in these towns, what makes them distinct, is that the architecture doesn't change to cement block for blocks if not a mile, in what is usually a concentric pattern from the Plaza Mayor that is fairly uniform in all directions. In other words, no matter how crappy it eventually becomes, if it is colonial and charming for 200 meters north of the Town Square, it will usually also be Colonial and Charming 200m west, east, and south before it drops off to the banal cement homes that make up Latin America everywhere, with high walls, bad lighting, and barking dogs. The best case scenario, seen occasionally but not often, is that the town drops off to farmland and perhaps even forest or jungle from the last colonial house... these are special places.

Most Countries in Latin America have one special town they have cleaned up and send the tourists to, and they treat it as their cultural homeland. The best ones join the ever growing list of World Heritage sites, many deservedly, some just because the UN has a hard time saying no.
Here is a list of as many notable ones as I could think of or have visited, as exhaustive a list as I can come up with. My favorite, for some odd reason, is Casco Viejo in Panama City, which still has a lovely blend of charm, ocean, down and out, and creativity.

If you can believe it, this list starts in the United States:
Tumacacori Mission, Arizona just a mission, but amazingly pristine
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Santa Barbera Mission, California

Mission San Antonio de Padua, Fort Hunter Ligget, California again, just a mission, but pristine

Old San Juan, Puerto Rico

San Luis, Colorado (hard to explain.. not completely, but they still use the Water Canal System from the days when it was part of Mexico)

Mexico has 50 Colonial Towns they have dolled up and given special distinction, and extra money to stimulate tourism. The Extra money isn't always great. They are paving all the streets now of Todos Santos, in southern Baja, and it is somehow removing something, but the place does look more first world now no doubt.
50 Pueblo Magicos
http://www.pueblosmexico.com.mx/pueblos_magicos.php
San Cristobol de Las Casas
Cuernavaca, Morelos (Cortez's headquarters)
Tasco, Guerro (famous for it's dramatic mountainside setting)
Todos Santos, BCS
San Ignacio, BCS
Mulege, BCS
El Triunfo, BCS
Loreto BCS
Mexcaltitan, Nayarit   the Mexican Venice

Havana Cuba
Cienfuegos Cuba
Trinidad Cuba
Camaguey Cuba

Bamayo Cuba

Santiago de Cuba, Cuba

Vinales Cuba

Antigua, Guatemala
Granada, Nicaragua
Casco Viejo, Ciudad Panama, Panama
Portobello, Panama
Nombre De Dios, Panama (perhaps the oldest settlement on the mainland of the Americas)
Cartagena, Colombia
Mompox, Colombia
La Mina, Cesar, Colombia
Popoyan, Colombia
Villa De Lavaya, Colombia
Santa Fe De Antioquia, Antioquia, Colombia
Barichara, Colombia
La Candelaria, Bogota, Colombia
Paraty, Brazil
Salvador, Brazil
Ouro Prieto, Brazil
Cusco, Peru
Cotacachi, Ecuador
Quito,Ecuador
Las Penas, Guayaquil, Ecuador (tiny portion of guayaquil, although historically significant)
Cuenca, Ecuador
Parroquia de Tumbabiro, Ecuador
Sucre, Bolivia
Valparaiso, Chile

A Geography of Hotness

It's hard for me to explain this endeavor as anything more than what some might see as utterly reprehensible objectification. Guilty!
For those who would say fetish is an immaturity to be transcended for the great things of life to come, I might agree, but with two caveats:
1. Fetish might be one of the Great Things in Life, at least for a while, and in addition,
2. The only way to get past it might be to explore it, thoroughly. In Baccus' Dance with Death all things are realized, said a Philosopher that I will decline to name now because it will make me look even more like an ass hole if you don't like the guy, but ponder his words for a second.
Going on from here, as I work to transcend, perhaps what motivates me in my weak animal moments is the smell and sight of a pretty girl, base as it may be... and to these usually idyll observations I have decided to try to add a little insight, to understand in the mind what the loins only report.

Reasons for Hotness:
Endless refinement within one society (The Horn of Africa)
A fortunate coming together of two groups (French Polynesia)
Crisis Breeding, the loss of a large portion of one gender, leading to increased selectivity (Germany after World War II)
A New Start: a Place where people move to improve their life, the most confident and potentially hottest of a society, starting a new culture that leads to in improved pool of Selectivity (California)
A great article by National Geographic, which seems to be available only in part, laid out some of the science behind attraction. It touched on a few of these themes, notably by saying that we are attracted to people in part if we think they have the greatest genetic variance from ours. This might be an explanation for Europeans tendency for Yellow Fever, and in New World you might call it Native Love, or Squaw Fever.
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Places of Reputed Hotness:

California USA
The American South
Hawaii
Miami: The Capitol of Latin America
The West Coast of Florida: The Dumbest Hottest Women in America
Ivy League Colleges
Washington DC: Power is the Ultimate Aphrodisiac
Around any Important Person
Las Vegas, Nevada: Trashy Hotness Commoditized, although not quite like LA
Las Vegas, Montreal, and Miami Strip Clubs
Jackson, Miss
Anywhere the Sun Shines
Quebec
British Colombia
Sinaloa, Mexico
El Salvador
Cuba
Colombia
Cali, Colombia (Ful Bodied)
Medellin, Colombia (Full Personality)
Bogota, Colombia (Classy)
Armenia and Pereira, Colombia (Sweet and Small Town)
Brazil
Argentina
Afrikaners
The Horn of Africa
Belfast, Ireland
Upper Class England
France
Italy
Spain
Greece, if you like em big!
Germany
Scandinavia
Iceland
Netherlands
Eastern Europe
Russia
Israel
Persia
Dubai
Baliwood
Thailand
Korea
Japan
Western Australia
The Gold Coast
Sydney
French Polynesia

Backpacker Ghettos: Around the World Without Leaving The Comfort of the Cheaply Recommended

Latin America:
Tumaco, Santa Marta, Colombia
Canoa, Ecuador
San Cristobol de Las Casas, Mexico
Cusco, Peru

Asia
The Hippie Trail
The Bannana Pancake Trail

Ubud, Bali, Indonesia
Raleigh Beach, Thailand
Koh Phi Phi Island, Thailand  
Khao San Road, Bangkok, Thailand
Chiang Mai, Thailand
Pai, Chiang Mai Province, Thailand
Vang Viang, Laos     Whooo.. Tubing!


Christchurch, New Zealand

Listless Rio: Cartagena, Colombia

Listless... it's hot.. the rocks seem to sweat.. the smog hangs in the air (I didn't realize how smoggy it was until Sunday morning, when it was clear, and the rest of the week I finally realized was not just 'hazy'). The people.. well, the only people with any spirit seem to be drunk Bogatenos and the guys constantly harassing you to drink at their bar, buy a necklace, sit in their plastic shack on their skeezy beach, or get some blow from their buddy.. sure it has history, but the man who made it most famous, Marquez, moved to Mexico for some reason... I think I know why now.. it has this reputation for being edgy, chic, but, well.. it's not that edgy, and it's not that chic... When you can do what you want, it just kind of becomes normal.. the hookers in Cartagena blend in like one more profession, being high on coke just makes you stand out as annoying, but there is no real party to join, class 'Colombian style' making that a private affair(although I have never been around in January.. when supposedly the place comes alive),..it is expensive for Latin America, and it is, well, old with a history, like that lady at the end of the bar who keeps to herself..
Now one can derive some satisfaction from the history, the place got steam rolled almost as many times as Sicily, but for me it was Francis Drake beating the crap out of them and burning a quarter of the city, which he did in grand style, that made me smile.. the rest seemed like dismal drudgery.. far from being exotic, the history became this sad 500 years of being a safety port for the Spanish Galleons, and now a kind of almost charming backwater that still decided to house a refinery and a container port in competition with Baranquilla that supposedly offers less, but somehow birthed Shakira and Sophia Vergare which is more than Cartagena can claim.. and Panama was where the real action was on the Spanish main, leaving this a provincial capitol of occasional tragedy interrupting decades of mind numbing heat, with an inquisition to boot.. it's kind of a Colombian Philadelphia in that Cartagena decided to ditch the King first, but the spirit of independence feels lost in kind of a blur of day to day.. well.. listlessness, again... other comparisons that might work, a San Diego, or Tampa, Boca Grande might be South Beach if you give it ten more years, if the sea doesn't swallow it first..but ah, that's ten more years in the numbing heat..
It's re-finding it's self, slowly.. the party crowd came, bought up the cool old buildings, but they don't completely share the charm.. the hippies pacified Magdalena, so that it's safe but somehow not an adventure anymore... the rich bought up all the possible public parks and made them parking lots, or condo towers, and what is left is, well, again... listless.. with nary a joke to lighten the load... i feel this is getting repetitive.. it's the listlessness...